Thomas La Grua's Journey to Awakening

June 24, 2012

Day 44: Women

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to upon seeing a woman for the first time, judge her on the basis of, would I want to have sex with her, or not; and within that judgment/categorization, give her a floating score, which would determine how I interacted with her from then on. Within this, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to (for almost my entire life) limit my interaction with women to a category of suitable to have sex with, or not suitable to have sex with; thus, shutting myself off from the opportunity to honestly interact with half of the world’s population.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as the mind’s energetic movements associated with seeing women in person, thought, and or pictures.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to within and as Ego, desire woman to desire me; and regarding woman that I perceive desire me, give them attention/respect; while woman that I perceive do not desire me, get no attention, and respect – given or not – is based on other factors.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define my attitude/attraction to/towards woman, based on their physical appearance, voice, and scent; and in doing so, allow the mind as definitions/limitations/illusion, to dominate over the physical/substance/life.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to participle within and as energetic reactions associated with woman whom I was/am attracted to, because it felt good; and within this, not see/realize/understand that by accepting/allowing the +/interest reactions/consequences, I am also accepting and allowing the -/disinterest reactions/consequences. Within this, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed me as mind to influence/move the physical, based on the nature of the mind activity, (+ or -).

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself participate within and as unconscious attraction / energetic movement / definitions to/towards women; not even realizing my participation, until the physical has responded to the mind; thus, not even seeing/realizing/understanding the very activity that is going on in my own mind.

I see realize and understand that my relationship to/towards women is and has been for quite some time, based on dishonesty – the definitions of the mind; and that through my de-facto acceptances and allowances of such dishonesty, I am equally as one, responsible for the creation of this world in and as its current state of gender inequality – abuse and degradation of women. Till here no further. I commit myself to no longer accept and allow the status-quo – women, defined. I furthermore commit myself to participate in the implementation of a world-wide correction that eliminates all inequality/abuse, so as to benefit all life equally.

Implementing such a correction on a world-wide scale requires that each being stand and no longer accept and allow anything less than absolute equality and oneness. Within this, I commit myself to point out to others, the abuse that women have been and are subject to, due to our real and de-facto acceptances and allowances of the definitions – cultural, stereotypical, etc., pertaining to women; and that such acceptances and allowances are the causes that lead to the consequences we as a civilization are currently experiencing – rape, prostitution, pornography, slavery, and so on. Leaders, politicization, presidents and kings do not create change; people do, and it’s time for the people to do just that: Stand as one and be the change; create a world system that benefits all life equally.

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2 Comments »

  1. The forgiveness is part of a process of stopping the “patterns.” The reason for stopping them is because they are (if they are) automated/systematic – of the mind. What I’m attempting to do is stop “all” reactions, so as “nothing” moves me, except me within and as the physical. Yes, it’s a challenge – and an adventure. Thanks for the comment.

    Comment by Thomas La Grua — June 24, 2012 @ 11:01 am

  2. I think you are being dishonest by forgiving yourself….if that was your natural reaction?

    Comment by John — June 24, 2012 @ 2:57 am


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