Thomas La Grua's Journey to Awakening

March 9, 2011

Self Forgiveness

Filed under: Writing out the Mind: 2010-July 2, 2012 — Tags: , , — Thomas La Grua @ 3:48 pm

SF on pretending to be something I’m not
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to pretend to be a personality that I’m not.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to pretend to speak, write and act a certain way in the hopes that others will believe that I am like them.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to act a certain way in the hopes that by acting that way I will become that way.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as an outsider.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to blame others for my feeling-like an outsider.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to buy into the idea that others don’t want to see the real me, because if they see the real me, they won’t like what they see.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear the ugly part of what I’ve created as me, and within and as this fear, hide that part of me from others.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give value to the ugly part of me because, I gave value to the ability to harm, revenge, manipulate, and survive.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I as life am not a personality.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire the Desteni people to see me as one of them.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to be a Destonian.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to be passionate about saving humanity, nature and the animals.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to pretend that I care about humanity.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to be passionate.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as not passionate, and within this definition see myself as less than another.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit myself within and as definitions such as passionate.
• I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that definitions are of the mind, and only serve to suppress that which I am as life.

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